The Space Between the Twin Towers
Thursday, September 15, 2011 at 09:41AM The space between the Twin Towers
is that gaping chasm
where meaning melts into chaos.
Where men fall to their deaths knowingly, intentionally,
and the sound of the bodies hitting ground zero
deafens the soul forever, for it allowed this travesty and remained silent
leaving this space complicit
in permitting their free fall.
She did not change the rules of nature and become dense to soften their landing
she failed to ask gravity to suspend its laws for those poor souls hurtling to their deaths
she stood silently by.
The space between the Twin Towers
allows for the absence of human and nature’ compassion
the pressure holding those twin towers of human greed
and capitalism apart, yet binding them in a partnership
becomes too unbearable for her
and, while signing on to a suicide pact with the devil in two jets,
she betrays the towers by staying, and surviving
while they crumble and melt.
She has signed a death pact with nature, the devil and gravity
unbeknownst to all of us.
The space between the Twin Towers
is the space that allows us to breathe
an airlock of concrete-free reality
in the tip of concrete lower Manhattan
a lebensraum,
but destined to be filled with the Pompeii-Like ash
as they melted downwards to the earth.
The space between the Twin Towers
has remained after the towers have fallen
these ten years,
bearing witness to what was once there
as if it has been released from its confinement
forever. And annually the blue lights that fill the footprints of the towers
leaving two eerie ghost-like columns in the sky
that space is exposed once again in its guilt.
The space between the Twin Towers
will be forgotten
unlike the towers themselves,
yet it eerily presses on my consciousness
making itself felt in uncanny times.
When at a loss for words
theologically, an inability to make sense of a divine order
where human life has become so cheap
my mind wanders to this space;
when the unfathomable horror of human cruelty
of man’s inhumanity to man
makes itself felt in the heart
I am drawn to this space;
and when my own heart of darkness reveals its inexplicable presence
in my relationships, my little betrayals of self and others,
I find a paradoxical solace in this space.
For me it has become the metaphor
for the absence of meaning
for cruelty and torture
for the appropriation of 9/11 as an icon to make profit
and punditry
and for all the trade center represented but hid so well,
the darker side, the underbelly of capitalism and Wall street.
It also reflects my own failure to confront and act
to just sit on the sidelines of history
and watch
(oh how I remember in my idealism of youth
questioning those in Germany and Europe
in the 30’s for their inaction and passiveness.)
Now guilty of the same I feel the presence of this space bearing down on me.
These last 10 years,
the insane rebuilding to “show them”
the lockdown of our freedoms,
the lack of fundamental change in our society,
the inability to “learn from the tragedy”,
the absence of new vision,
the upsurge in world violence,
the ongoing internecine hatred...
all points to the presence of the absence
the ongoing effect of this space
the presence of its effects
continuing
despite the loss of the twins it held together
in tension
despite the release of their hubris
it is present
the space between the Twin Towers.
Eulogy for Reb Yudel
Tuesday, August 2, 2011 at 09:52PM he carried so much suffering
he was so tormented
and with this weight
with this past
he lived
despite
he was such a presence
his drawn cachectic eyes
and his face reminded me of Chagall's Rabbiner
etched in those very eyes were all of European misery
and it never left his consciousness
yet at times there was space for playfullness and mirth
"ehr lacht!" he would say of me
and his questions always challenged me,
so tied in with pshat and medieval trivia...
as a midrashic man he drove me crazy!
it was so hard for him to accommodate to Amerika
to the softness and the food
to the time for leisure
he was so stuck in Europe.
his deference for scholars and rebbes
was transmitted to his children
and his love, typically european
in his inability to express verbally or physically.
so now we remember him, his life, his his-story
as he embodies everything in transition for there to here
from the trauma to the silence of the present
from that tradition steeped in shtetl piety
to the openness of New York.
he was an essentially tragic man
which attracted me so much to him
and I felt my purpose to humor him and make him laugh
a little
just a little
and in my home
he could possibly let go a little
from the bonds of the lived life of pain
the body of suffering that inhabited his consciousness
without even him being able see it.
In Memoriam
to Reb Yudel
whom I shall miss as he walked into my home with his characteristic gait and folded arms
into my arms for a wonderful bear hug.
I will miss that hug, mot of all.
Ezras Israel Dinner Honoring Holocaust Survivors
Thursday, June 23, 2011 at 04:32AM Axial Skeleton
Friday, March 25, 2011 at 11:32AM As in death, during sleep this skeletal frame is fairly useless;
Illness as Incarnation
Monday, March 21, 2011 at 03:10PM In illness the “evil” the negative, the infective becomes incarnate in the flesh in the body finding its fulfillment in the fever and suppuration.